WHAT YOU WILL NEED:
1 package tempeh
1/2 onion, cut into big big pieces
sesame oil
coriander
soy sauce (or braggs, braggs is better.)
sriracha hot chili sauce (also known as COCK SAUCE)
2 cloves of garlic
1/2 tomato
lettuce
white or sourdough bread
fake mayonaise (nayo-naise)
DIRECTIONS:
get a frying pan, heat it on medium heat, pour in sesame oil. i dont know
how much, this isnt fucking rocket science guys. too much and you will hurt
your stomach eating grease, too little and the tempeh will burn. don't turn
up the stove too high or the sesame oil will burn, it is a low temp cooking
oil.
cut the tempeh into thin strips a
nd put it in the pan. let it sit one side
is golden brown (what a typical cooking-phrase.)
then, flip is over, and add the onion, and let it sit for a minute or two
add a pinch of coriander. do not put the onions in earlier or they will
overcook and be slimy and STUPID (a legitimate word to describe food.) when
it is starting to get "golden brown" turn down the heat a little, and add
some soy sauce. this is your call, too much and it will be too salty. it
will make a bunch of steam/smoke and at this point you should stir it all
up. then add the garlic. stir it again for a bit. if the stove is too
hot, the garlic will burn, and you fucked up. THEN, add the sweet sweet
cock-sauce. give it a good squirt, stir it, and cover your nose and mouth
with your handy bandana because it will make you cough a whole bunch.
but trust me, it will taste good.
okay, your tempeh is done, turn off the stove.
toast the bread, put the nayonaisse on the bread, put a slice of tomato and
some lettuce, then layer on the tempeh/onions. there should be a good
amount of onions there.
now eat your sandwich.
this makes two good sized sandwiches, maybe three if you are a wuss.
posted by geoff on 7/26/2004 12:01:51 PM
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